NORFOLK, Va. — The Navy stands on the shoulders of great traditions, none greater than the ability to thrust its very essence into the hearts of the nation’s enemies, which may include (but is not limited to) other boats, docks, beaches, and, you know, stuff on the water.

For one, it just sounds cool when a ships’ captain calls for the crew to "Prepare to ram!" Think of how many movie scenes have benefited in the past a from such moments. By bringing that order back, every future Navy film will be that much more incredible.

Like the future movie about the inevitable clashes with the US and China in the South China Sea. There could be at least two, maybe even three ramming opportunities there.

Or the whole thing with Iran. They use those tiny little boats. Bumper cars will have nothing on an aircraft carrier that just goes all “YOLO!” over those little Iranian speed bumps.

The possibilities are endless. The military options are also practically infinite.

Anything good enough for von Tegetth…