Petraeus Apologizes for Affair, Asks Auditorium of 600 If He Can ‘Crash On Anybody’s Couch Tonight’
LOS ANGELES, CA — During his first public speech in months, a visibly haggard and unkempt David Petraeus apologized for an extramarital affair just prior to asking a crowd of 600 attendees whether he could sleep on anybody’s couch once the evening drew to a close.
“Please allow me to begin my remarks this evening by reiterating how deeply I regret, and a…
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