Philosopher NCO Poses Age-Old Logical Paradox: ‘Are You Calling Me A Liar?’
FORT CAMPBELL, Ky. — Soldiers of the 101st Airborne were once again treated to the wisdom of one of the division’s most renowned philosophers this week, sources report.
“Monday morning around 0500, I was reading a book at the desk near the end of my CQ shift,” Pfc. Edward Stone told Duffel Blog. “All of a sudden [Sgt. 1st Class] Allen storms in and shouts, “Wake up, you! Why the fuck are you sleeping?”
“I tried to explain that I was reading, not sleeping,” Stone continued. “And that’s when I knew I’d walked right into his logical trap, because he asked me, ‘Are you calling me a liar?’”
“It’s a classic paradox, a question to which there's no right answer,” according to Dr. Robert Feldman, Professor of Philosophy at the United States Military Academy. “Sgt. Allen is following in the footsteps of Socrates: using logic to embarrass and expose people who think they understand the truth. Or, in this case, to arbitrarily crush some poor Joe’s nuts.”
Soldiers in the company marveled at the rich p…
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