FORT HOOD, Texas — Army Pvt. Anthony Giorodano has been standing at ease in formation this morning for more than 23 minutes unaware that there is an enormous dick drawn on his face, sources confirmed today.
The marker drawing began with a detailed scrotum on the man’s forehead, wrapped around his right cheek, snaked up his nose, between his eyes, rounded his left eye, and finally terminated on his left cheek. It was drawn, according to sources, after Giorodano passed out early during a night of heavy drinking in the barracks.
Giorodano, who was seen rocking impatiently on his heels while the company first sergeant addressed the formation about a chow detail, didn’t notice the quiet laughter around him, sources say.
“I have no idea how no one else saw this thing. It was practically visible from space,” said one soldier. “How passed out do you have to be to not feel this being done to you? I bet it took them 15 minutes of drawing.”
