Sailor Claiming Made-Up PTSD Has Nightmares Of Not Receiving Disability Check

TAMPA, Fla. — A former sailor who left the Navy in 2011 and claimed he had post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) to the Department of Veterans Affairs soon after says he's been having terrifying nightmares of not receiving his disability check, sources tell Duffel Blog.

Now majoring in Liberal Arts at the University of South Florida with dreams of becoming a non-contributing zero, Ryan Wankston told reporters his recent nightmares have been keeping him awake at night, as he's often woken up to his own screams in a cold sweat.

"Oh God! We haven't been resupplied yet, we're going to die out here," his girlfriend recounted him saying in a nightmare shortly before he woke up. "Did the VA make the payment yet? What if it doesn't come through?"

According to sources, Wankston served onboard the USS George Washington (CVN-73) as a culinary specialist for four years, having deployed to the Persian Gulf and the Pacific. Although he never participated in combat operations, the 23-year-old the VA eventually rated 100% disabled recalled the horrors of war with Duffel Blog reporters.

"I don't really like to talk about it, since we lost so many good men out there," Wankston said of Navy SEALs he didn't know who died in Afghanistan. "They gave up their today's for our tomorrow's direct deposit."

Other terrible experiences Wankston said contributed to his debilitating PTSD and depression include having to wake up early, being denied a shave chit by the corpsman, and once being yelled at by a really mean Chief.

Now that he's left the Navy, Wankston said, his PTSD has been exacerbated by not only nightmares of the bullshit experiences he told a VA psychologist, but also his fear that the free money from the government would suddenly come to an end.

"Just like a lot of guys with post-traumatic stress, I live in fear every day of my life. But we're all just trying to move on with our lives, you know?" Wankston said, momentarily pausing from applying for Social Security benefits that would add at least another $1000 to the nearly $3000 he receives for being a worthless moocher. "I just want to be like everyone else: Get a job and give back to society."

"Well, not literally get a job," he said.

At press time, Wankston was seen installing his handicapped license plate to his new Dodge Charger before heading to the local car wash.

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