'Quiet professional' is neither

FORT BRAGG, N.C. — A U.S. Army Special Operations Command soldier and self-proclaimed 'quiet professional' is neither, according to several of his civilian and military peers.

"There goes that asshole [Staff Sgt.] Bruckner again, using his Special Ops status to impress local women into coming home with him from the bar," said Sgt. Alan Hale, one of Bruckner's coworkers, as he looked at several newly-posted selfies on the latter's Facebook profile. "If you ask me, our boss should have kicked him back to the Big Army ages ago."

As a member of a command home to some of the nation's most elite forces, Lance Bruckner has distinguished himself from his colleagues through his lackadaisical military bearing, barely-in-regs haircuts, and loud mouth while off-duty — particularly on social media.

This has earned him the frustration of his chain of command and resentment of his fellow soldiers, sources say.

Bruckner has been on numerous missions to hot-spots, as well as low-intensity conflict areas, around the globe, to include Afghanistan, Pakistan, Iraq, Syria, Somalia, Yemen, Mali, and Libya, according to updates he posted to his personal blog.

His Facebook profile also says he has deployed with teams responsible for deep reconnaissance and direct action missions, along with "kinetic advisory operations" aiding foreign forces. He claims to always wait until his temporary duty assignments (TDYs) and deployments are over before writing.

"I never give out sensitive details at the time," Bruckner claimed, pausing for a moment before tweeting that he was being interviewed by reporters.

Many of Bruckner's peers and higher-ups want to release him back to his old unit in the conventional army, but have stopped short of doing so because his skills are invaluable.

"As a person, Bruckner is a shitbag. No question about that," says Capt. Ron Malik, a Special Forces officer in charge of Bruckner. "But he's just too damn good at his job for us to replace him."

"Nobody can set up a secure comm-link at a remote hide-site like he can."

At press time, sources said Bruckner wasn't even a Special Forces soldier at all, but a member of the Joint Communications Unit who hasn't once been in combat.