KABUL, Afghanistan – A Taliban After-Action Review (AAR) being conducted following a failed car-bombing in the Kabul International Zone is not going well, since the suicide bomber involved in the attack refuses to take part, Duffel Blog has learned.

Sources confirmed that Taliban Commander Mustafa Kardowi is flummoxed by deficiencies that he wrote down while observing the unsuccessful attack and would very much like to work through them with the personnel involved.

“I made a Powerpoint and everything,” Kardowi told Duffel Blog, standing at the podium in a mostly empty room, with a few Taliban lieutenants shifting nervously behind the projector. “But this fucking guy isn’t participating.”