They're Scrapping The USS Enterprise? Oh, Cry Me A River
The following is an opinion piece written by the Stern Plate of the USS Enterprise (CV-6), submitted from River Vale, N.J.
I was reading a piss-soaked newspaper some homeless guy left on me the other day, and apparently the USS Enterprise (CVN-65) is being scrapped. Yes, the oldest active-duty ship in the fleet is off to be turned into Chinese razor blades and maybe a Prius.
Welcome to the Navy, from one Big E to another.
Oh I'm sorry. You don't know who I am?
I'm all that's left of the original carrier Enterprise, laid down in 1936, scrapped in 1960, and the most decorated warship in U.S. naval history. Do you know how many Medals of Honor and Navy Crosses were awarded to my sailors? Of course not.
I used to be something. Back in 1945, James Forrestal called me the "one vessel that most nearly symbolizes the history of the Navy in this war." That's how they do ya. The moment everyone starts tossing around the praise and British Admiralty pennants, you know you're totally screwed.
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