The most recent victim is Pvt. Abdul-Ahad Fattah, who was tricked into buying a 1974 short bus for $12 at 250% interest. Fattah was impressed by the vehicle’s low 230,000 miles and the ability to stack 75 suitcases on top tied down by a single bungee cord.

“This thing is going to get me all the pussy,” Fattah said, slapping the rusted hood of his jingle truck. “The engine makes a high pitched squeal, she burns oil like a champ, and the brakes are hanging on by a thread, just like an American Humvee.”

Fattah added he planned to decorate the interior with a string of Corona lights and a Scarface poster.