By Red Friday

KABUL, AFGHANISTAN — In the first signs that the U.S. may have had more of a lasting effect in Afghanistan than previously hoped, sources are reporting that used jingle truck dealerships in Kabul are trapping Taliban recruits into predatory loans in record numbers.

The most recent victim is Pvt. Abdul-Ahad Fattah, who was tricked into buying a 1974 short bus for $12 at 250% interest. Fattah was impressed by the vehicle’s low 230,000 miles and the ability to stack 75 suitcases on top tied down by a single bungee cord.