'We're winning this arms race,' Mattis says during workout at Kremlin gym
MOSCOW — On a recent visit to the Russian President's personal gym, Defense Secretary Jim Mattis declared that the United States was "clearly winning this arms race," sources confirmed today.
Mattis, who possesses imposing 20-inch arms, says the Russians are lagging far behind the U.S. in terms of both precision munitions and triceps definition.
In the country to discuss pressing issues of defense cooperation, Mattis told his counterparts that the US would not be intimidated by Russian posturing, even if Prime Minister Dmitry Medvedev decided to strike another "most muscular" pose during his opening speech.
As both nations reportedly attempt to expand their nuclear arsenals, Mattis advised caution, stating that each country's nuclear inventory is already "swole as fuck." However, he also noted that the U.S. has packed on far more mass in conventional weapons since the end of the Cold War, whereas Russia has been in a "cutting phase."
"Their Air Force is so puny it reminds me of Sergey Lav…
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