FORT BRAGG, N.C. — Army Staff Sgt. Brian O’Malley, a petroleum handling specialist with four combat deployments under his belt, was excited to see the results of a 23andMe genetic test he got as a birthday gift, but never expected what they would say — that he is almost entirely burn-pit ash! Who would have guessed?

“I thought I’d probably be mostly Irish,” said O’Malley, puzzling over the colorful pie chart. “But this says I’m 68 percent charred camel flesh and surplus military equipment!” Wow. What a journey of self-discovery!”

According to the test results, O’Malley is also 12 percent Irish, 8 percent Native American, 1 percent Viking, 3 percent Doxycycline, and 2 percent diesel fumes.

O’Malley’s results took some doing to obtain. The swab required for the test took three tries because O’Malley repeatedly stabbed the swab into a thick pack of wintergreen Skoal. The results also suggested he is at least 1 percent oral cancer, but 23andMe expects that number may grow in the coming months.