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The Duffel Brief · the free edition, Monday, Wednesday and Friday

Vol. 15 · No. 126 · Thursday, 22 October 2026

Pentagon

Hegseth consults God via dumpster fire behind Pentagon

Secretary says God commanded him to invade Greenland, restore Christian values

US to livestream execution of Ukraine

Iran condemns US plan to livestream execution as barbaric

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Vol. 15 · No. 126 · Deployed worldwide

Thursday

22 October 2026

0043 Zulu

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· Page 2

Soldiers re-invade Germany by mistake, reignite WWII

Filed · 1545

GRAFENWÖHR, GERMANY – During a training deployment to the Grafenwöhr Training Area, a U.S. Army unit mistakenly invaded Germany, effectively re-igniting World War II, according to a spokesman for 7th Army Headquarters.

A platoon of soldiers from 1st Infantry Division was conducting training on one of the outlying western ranges when the professional opposing force staged a mock ambush. When the Opposition Forces broke contact and retreated in an unknown direction, new platoon leader Second Lt. Chester Prasnicki directed his soldiers to pursue. Once it became clear that the OPFOR could not be located, and furthermore that the platoon was now lost, Prasnicki drew upon his land-navigation expertise gained as a USMA cadet, and maneuvered his platoon due west.

The platoon left the training area and moved west onto the nearby German town of Auerbach. The 1st ID soldiers, presuming the town to be a part of the training area, began conducting house-clearing operations. When confronted by armed locals, the forward observer called for a fire mission. Due to a communications mix-up and a live-fire mortar mission being simultaneously conducted elsewhere on the training area, 120mm high-explosive mortar rounds were launched into the German town.

Amazingly, no civilians were killed, but several restaurants and bars in the town, which, ironically, were popular with U.S. servicemembers, were decimated.

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