NORFOLK, VA – The special operations community has been rocked by news the Navy's elite counter-terrorism force, SEAL Team 6, recently failed mission requirements for operational dental readiness.
The entire force is currently designated as Dental Fitness Class 3, which places them in a "non-readiness compliant" category. Now non-deployable, there has been an outcry from military commanders unable to utilize an asset normally reserved for high level classified operations.
"This is ludicrous," observed Vice Adm. John Miller, commander of 5th Fleet. "I guess now we know how Bin Laden was able to escape Tora Bora. Seriously, has tooth abscess ever really hurt anyone?"
Command dentists for USNAVSPECWARCOM, remain firm in their diagnosis of the team's ongoing dental wellness issues. "To a man they are on the verge of a dental emergency within the next six to twelve months," said one. He went on to explain Team 6 members suffer various dental conditions including cavities, root canal infections, and temporomadibular disorders.
