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The Duffel Brief · the free edition, Monday, Wednesday and Friday

Vol. 15 · No. 118 · Sunday, 4 October 2026

Navy & Marines

Paste-eating Marine praised for unmatched commitment to unit

Unit leaders say his ability to stick with the mission is unmatched

Backed-up toilet appointed new Secretary of the Army

Space Force’s new uniform puts a little goose back in the step

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Vol. 15 · No. 118

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Duffel Blog

Established 2012 · Deployed worldwide

Vol. 15 · No. 118 · Deployed worldwide

Sunday

4 October 2026

1009 Zulu

Next edition Monday

← Front page
· Page 2

BREAKING: Your Christmas leave is cancelled

Filed · 1541

YOUR LEAVE ADDRESS — Sources confirmed on this joyous and wonderful Christmas morning that your much-earned leave block far, far away from the flag pole to spend time with your family has just been cancelled.

"It would behoove you to stop opening goddamn presents and get your ass back to base," said your company first sergeant, momentarily pausing from distributing coal and charge sheets at a nearby barracks. "Besides, troops on deployment aren't home this Christmas, so neither should you."

When questioned about when you might get a break, your battalion sergeant major was incensed. "A break? Not getting shot at by the Taliban is a break," he said. "We obviously need to conduct more PMCS around here, I can still see the bluing on our weapons."

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