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The Duffel Brief · the free edition, Monday, Wednesday and Friday

Vol. 15 · No. 125 · Monday, 19 October 2026

Pentagon

US to livestream execution of Ukraine

White House promises largest pay-per-view military event in history

Iran condemns US plan to livestream execution as barbaric

Vetbro apparel company pivots from stupid shirts to aggressively homoerotic ones

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Vol. 15 · No. 125

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Vol. 15 · No. 125 · Deployed worldwide

Monday

19 October 2026

0344 Zulu

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· Page 2

State Department awards immigration visas to 1,000 dead interpreters

Filed · 1540

KABUL, Afghanistan — The diplomatic mission in Kabul is set to announce the issuance of Special Immigrant Visas to 1,000 Afghan interpreters who were recently murdered by the Taliban, Duffel Blog has learned.

"We've accumulated over 12,000 applications over the years and have been taking a lot of heat to get them processed," Ambassador James B. Cunningham told reporters. "Turns out the easiest ones to issue are for the folks who the Taliban already found in their homes and executed."

State Department officials in the region — cloistered away in fortified compounds where they can shuffle their papers in safety — have long been accused of gross mismanagement of the Special Immigrant Visa Program. In 2011, a total of three visas were issued to Afghan interpreters. While the numbers have increased modestly since then, progress is still slow for the thousands of translators who have not yet been kidnapped while drinking tea at a local cafe, been decapitated while being filmed for propaganda purposes, been thrown off a bridge after being burned alive, or simply murdered by family members for their association with the infidels.

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