FORT BENNING, Ga. — After completing one of the most grueling training programs the United States military has to offer, sources confirmed today that the first order of business for the two female graduates of Army Ranger school is to “crush tons of fucking pussy” this weekend.
First Lts. Kristen Griest and Shaye Haver — the first-ever women to graduate Ranger School — plan to attack the Fort Benning bar scene in similar fashion to their approach for each phase of Ranger School.
“With no fucking mercy,” said Griest, who sources say plans to pull at least one hat trick per day starting Friday and into infinity. “These motherfuckers better watch out. I haven’t been laid in over four months.”
