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The Duffel Brief · the free edition, Monday, Wednesday and Friday

Vol. 15 · No. 115 · Friday, 25 September 2026

Pentagon

Military leaders debate who gets to masturbate first in sniper arch

Services clash over historic privilege of being first to defile nation’s newest military monument

Mitch McConnell returns from extended drill weekend

Trump considers replacing Hegseth with rock or something

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Vol. 15 · No. 115

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Duffel Blog

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Vol. 15 · No. 115 · Deployed worldwide

Friday

25 September 2026

2245 Zulu

Next edition Monday

← Front page
· Page 2

Candidates vow to support troops with prepared statements, Facebook posts through election

Filed · 1538

WASHINGTON — Presidential hopefuls vowed yesterday to fully support the military with prepared statements and social media posts in the months leading up to the elections.

"Wednesday was Veteran's Day, " Anna Epstein, press secretary for GOP candidate Carly Fiorina noted. "But we believe that every day until the election should be Veteran's Day, and to help raise awareness, we have purchased literally dozens of stock photos of happy troops."

"Hillary Clinton absolutely cares about the representation of the military across her social media platforms and will do everything to show it until election night," said Katie Dowd, Director of Social Media for the Clinton campaign. "She has been under fire with our troops, so she wants her brothers and sisters in arms to be a focal point of her brand."

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