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The Duffel Brief · the free edition, Monday, Wednesday and Friday

Vol. 15 · No. 117 · Thursday, 1 October 2026

Army

Backed-up toilet appointed new Secretary of the Army

Pentagon says clogged fixture brings “continuity, stability and ability to swallow enormous amounts of shit”

Space Force’s new uniform puts a little goose back in the step

Military leaders debate who gets to masturbate first in sniper arch

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Vol. 15 · No. 117

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Vol. 15 · No. 117 · Deployed worldwide

Thursday

1 October 2026

0028 Zulu

Next edition Friday

← Front page
· Page 2

Hardest working soldier in battalion wins 'more work' award

Filed · 1537

FORT BELVOIR, Va. – Staff Sgt. Jim Brown, long regarded as the hardest working member of 302nd Signal Battalion, has been awarded the prestigious and uncoveted "More Work Award" for his history of dedicated service.

“If you want something done, ask the busiest person you know,” said Sgt 1st Class Martin Clark, Brown’s Platoon Sgt., who has nominated Brown for the award many times. “I can’t trust a lot of soldiers to complete their tasks to standard, but I can always trust Brown."

"I myself have given many of my own tasks to him.“

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