SHAW AFB, S.C. — Hey, yo Colonel, I'm real happy for you, and I'm gonna let you finish your safety brief, but I wanted to say some things before you do. First off, the sergeant major gives the best safety briefs of all time. Soldiers, good morning, look at the valedictorian, scared of the future as I hop in my DeLorean. Wait, I'm sorry, sometimes I just get lost in my amazing art from the past. Anyways, first thing first, don't drink and drive. I know you want to get out there and go H.A.M, hard as a mother, damn, I did it again. Back to the point, drinking and driving is the worst personal decision you can make, other than voluntarily watching
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