That's The Nicest Penis I've Seen In All My Years As A Urinalysis NCO

The following is a guest column by Sergeant 1st Class William Avery, who volunteered to be a urinalysis NCO.

I'm going to be honest with you. I've been doing this a long time, and that's the nicest penis I've ever seen piss into a plastic cup.

Now, I'm not just saying that, trust me. I don't just throw these kind of compliments around. I'm what you call a…