Seven Marines dead after eating nicotine-infused crayons

Camp Lejeune officials say “Crayola Xtreme!” product line linked to riots and overdoses

Troops say casualties in Iran should be used for maximum political impact

Service members report greater concern over optics than operational guidance

Navy stakes claim to contested Gays of Hormuz

Service says designation reflects ‘longstanding traditions’ in the fleet

Marine dives on grenade to save Dow from falling below 50,000

Commandant praises sacrifice for ‘investor confidence’

Pacific not pivoted to yet again

'I'm starting to think America doesn't care about Great Power Competition at all,' says Chinese defense minister

Marine almost went finance but ‘would have punched a managing director’

"I almost got my MBA. Totally wanted to. But my dad wanted me to kill the enemies of America.”

Military websites undergo annual update to make them worse

“We’re working hard to make the SIPR sites you need the most confusing piles of shit imaginable," an official said.

Anonymous donor gives Pentagon 130 million cans of Skoal wintergreen to pay troops

Donation will “tide everyone over” until someone finds seven billion more cans

Tracker S3A updates tracker that tracks tracker updates

Battalion leadership confident spreadsheet power will deter China.

Top 10 things you can’t buy because you're not getting paid

Congress assures troops that poverty builds character.

Hegseth sets record for largest military D&D campaign ever

Hundreds of generals trapped at Quantico after DTS crash forced to role-play their way out.

General officer summit extended for K-Pop Demon Hunter singalong

Generals relieved it wasn’t a firing squad or Eyes Wide Shut reenactment

Mattis emerges from time machine, horrified to learn Pete Hegseth is SecDef

General returns to find ICE in museums, POWs in Ukraine, and the Constitution on vacation.

ICE deports Sergeant Major of the Marine Corps

Noem visit to LA troops ends in gunfire, K-9 fatality

DHS Secretary insists dog was ‘out of regs and possibly liberal.’

US 'far behind in capabilities' being sold by retired general

The retired officer says that America is woefully under-resourced in a defense technology capability that is only sold by his company.

Neuralink placed in Marine crashes Pornhub

"I saw it all. All of Pornhub at once. I was, like, the god of porn for a minute.”

Duffel Blog presents: The 10 dumbest military phrases

"There’s no ‘I’ in team" but there are three 'U's in "shut the f--k up"

Pope dies rather than spend 15 more minutes with a POG

Anonymous clergy sources confirmed that Francis had reviewed Vance’s background and uttered the words “Not today, Satan."

Satan growing concerned he overpaid for JD vance’s soul

“I guess I thought there was more humanity to unravel with J.D.”

GWOT reenactors gather for disconnected violence, ill-conceived civil projects

Corners remain to be turned, contracts to be awarded

Theologians say God actually hates the infantry

"Look me in the eye and tell me God does not 100% revile the infantry."