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Okinawa Approves New Marine Air Station On Unstable Volcanic Island

Okinawa Approves New Marine Air Station On Unstable Volcanic Island

NAHA, Okinawa Prefecture — Hailed as yet another landmark consular victory between the United States and Japan, Gov. Hirokazu Nakaima signed legislation today moving Marine Corps Air Station (MCAS) Futenma to an unnamed and still-forming island 800 miles east of Okinawa.

Nakaima in 2013 broke a seven-year impasse between the two nations by signing a bill relocating the airbase to a less populated area on mainland Okinawa. But sources indicate that this year he has become "sick of all [the Marines'] bullshit" and accelerated the relocation in hopes "they burn in the agonizing, eternal Hell of (Goddess of Fire) Aino's bosom."

Maj. Gen. Charles S. Hudson, Commanding General Marine Corps Installation Pacific (MCIPAC), is personally ecstatic about the decision and can't wait to get started on Futenma's construction.