No One Gives A Shit About CO's ‘26.2’ Bumper…

FORT BENNING, Ga. – Despite demonstrating a commendable tolerance for chafed nipples, sources confirmed today that no one in the 3rd Ranger Battalion gives a shit about Lt. Col. Donovan Studebaker running a fucking marathon. Studebaker, who assumed command last month, admitted that the deafening indifference towards his locomotive prowess was a bit of a shock.

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