Local General Has Epic Day Off While ‘Sick’ …

HEIDELBERG, Germany — Lt. Gen. Christopher Cavoli, commander of all US Army forces in Europe, is totally not at work today because he has coronavirus and not because he’s having an epic day off, said US Army Europe spokesperson Maj. Traun Moore. According to a statement, Cavoli was absolutely recovering in bed because he did not want to spread the deadly coronavirus and, in his weakened condition, he might take a nasty spill down the stairs and subject himself to further injuries.

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