Clitoris Porta-John artwork goes largely unrecognized
"We honestly just thought people were into canoeing"
Base maintenance curious about hundreds of curvy little canoes drawn in porta-johns
A trove of clitoris artwork was discovered in hundreds of Porta-Johns returned from Al-Harir Air Base to the U.S. this week, the Army Center of Military History announced.
The Porta-Johns were undergoing routine maintenance when Pfc. Miranda St. Germaine made an offhand comment about the large amount of dick and clitoris drawings she was painting over. St. Germaine’s squad leader overheard the comment and demanded she point out the purported devil’s doorbells.
“At first I couldn’t see them, no matter how long I stared,” said Staff Sgt. William Sovick. “It reminded me of those posters from Spencer's Gifts that are supposed to have a 3D dinosaur. But just like those posters, I spotted one once I relaxed my eyes and made St. Germaine show me with a laser pointer for 45 minutes.”
The discovery led to the unearthing of thousands of similar clitoris drawings throughout military installations and museums which had been previously overlooked, sending shockwaves through the military history community.
“They were right there in front of us, hiding in plain sight,” said USS Midway curator Dan Jenkins. “Literally, thousands of never before recognized clitorises on the walls of every toilet from the halls of Montezuma to the bulkheads of the USS Tripoli. And supposedly, they can be found in 50% of the human population, but I’ve seen no evidence of such.”
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