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The Duffel Brief · the free edition, Monday, Wednesday and Friday

Vol. 15 · No. 116 · Monday, 28 September 2026

Pentagon

Military leaders debate who gets to masturbate first in sniper arch

Services clash over historic privilege of being first to defile nation’s newest military monument

Mitch McConnell returns from extended drill weekend

Trump considers replacing Hegseth with rock or something

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Vol. 15 · No. 116

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Vol. 15 · No. 116 · Deployed worldwide

Monday

28 September 2026

1026 Zulu

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← Front page
Army · Page 4

Army times: Military working dogs smarter than junior officers

Filed · 1546

NEW YORK, NY — Military Working Dogs are more intelligent than second and first lieutenants, according to an article to be published next week in Army Times.

The article, titled "Who's Got the Smarts?" examines groups of soldiers from different ranks, military occupation specialties, and career branches, and then orders them by intelligence.

"We factored in several things," said Times managing editor Richard Brown, "such as test scores, writing samples, and difficulty of day-to-day tasks. Then we took the data and assigned each group a composite intelligence score."

According to the Times, the top three smartest groups in the Army are brain surgeons, CBRN officers, and JAG Corps attorneys.

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