For more than a decade, we've deployed pitch perfect satire to service members around the world.

Join thousands of troops, veterans, and defense insiders who read Duffel Blog before breakfast.

“A must-read for national security nerds.”

—The Daily Beast

Free. No spam. Unsubscribe anytime.

14years publishing

4,200+dispatches filed

17,000+readers briefed

· Page 2

Opinion: How many defense secretaries do I need to fire to strengthen our military?

By Duffel Blog Staff · Bureau · 1 minute

Filed 5 October 2022 · 1541

The following is a guest article written by the President Barack Obama.

My fellow Americans, thank you for sharing your time with me today.

It is with profound and sad joy that I am announcing the departure of the last dissenting voice from my cabinet, Defense Secretary Chuck Hagel. Now, we all know Chuck. I brought him on back in 2012 to replace Leon Panetta, who kept recommending plausible strategies and effective budgets.

Also on this page

Navy & Marines

Paste-eating Marine praised for unmatched commitment to unit

Unit leaders say his ability to stick with the mission is unmatched

Army

Backed-up toilet appointed new Secretary of the Army

Pentagon says clogged fixture brings “continuity, stability and ability to swallow enormous amounts of shit”

Air & Space

Space Force’s new uniform puts a little goose back in the step

White House says redesign projects discipline, strength and “absolutely no historical parallels”