NORFOLK, Va. — Naval Station Norfolk's long term parking is taking a number of steps to secure your full social security number and other personal information while you're on deployment, sources confirmed today.

Situated at the edge of an empty parking lot, the long term parking office is an impenetrable fortress, one source said, adding that tests found it is capable of securing the personal information required to park a car in a dirt lot.

"Yeah we have all the socials secured," said an employee who identified himself as 'Dixie Normous.' "We have all the top security measures in place like this latch on the door. It holds the door shut unless you give it a little jiggle. We stopped leaving the windows open at night now that it's getting colder as well."