This week in American power projection: the map was wrong, the dorms were fine, and the travel card was for official purposes.
Story Roundup
Pentagon casualties, metric improvement, and Fat Leonard’s least dignified phase.
Situation Report
North Pole warns of pilot shortage as reindeer leave for commercial sleighlines
SANTA'S WORKSHOP — The North Pole is in the midst of a readiness crisis as it struggles to fill its pilot ranks with qualified reindeer, who are leaving the service in record numbers to work at commercial sleighlines, sources confirmed today.
Santa Claus claims he has only 75 percent of the deerpower he needs to deliver presents this year, especially in crucial heavy lift squadrons.
"This is truly alarming. There is no way I'll be able to deliver presents to all the good girls and boys, let alone coal to all the naughty ones," said Claus. "The reindeer we do have are being worked to the antler, flying three or four gumdrop sorties a day."
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Trump strikes deal to buy precision missiles from North Korea
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Air Force IG uncovers SNACKOs taking kickbacks from Big Insulin
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Pentagon facing dangerous shortage of fucks given
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Opinion: Listen up, assholes. Turn in your excess cruise missiles or everybody stays in formation
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Army Reserve adopts 'Nothing we do today is more important than lunch' as new recruiting slogan
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