Skip to content
DUFFEL BLOG

Free military brief. No CAC required.

For more than a decade, we've deployed pitch perfect satire to service members around the world.

Join thousands of troops, veterans, and defense insiders who read Duffel Blog before breakfast.

“A must-read for national security nerds.”

—The Daily Beast
Subscribe form

Free. No spam. Unsubscribe anytime.

14years publishing
4,200+dispatches filed
20,000+readers briefed
Actual issue preview

This week in American power projection: the map was wrong, the dorms were fine, and the travel card was for official purposes.

Story Roundup

Pentagon casualties, metric improvement, and Fat Leonard’s least dignified phase.

Situation Report

A State Department map that relocated most of Africa, one ambitious government travel card, and 5,200 medical students moved from dorms that definitely do not have mold.

Agent Penis reassigned after CIA intruder blows his cover

Agent Penis reassigned after CIA intruder blows his cover

LANGLEY — Central Intelligence Agent Richard Penis has been reassigned to administrative duty after a woman compromised his secret identity by trespassing on CIA headquarters and requesting to speak with him, sources confirmed today.

The woman, who demanded that Agent Penis return her ID, claims to have been unaware that she was blowing Penis’s cover.

Agent Penis’s supervisor, Harold Balzac, lamented losing such a talented young agent in the field.

More Stories

Your Cart

Your cart is empty

Browse the shop to find something you like.

Continue Shopping →
Subtotal

Add more for free shipping.

✓ You qualify for free shipping!