Skip to content
DUFFEL BLOG

Free military brief. No CAC required.

For more than a decade, we've deployed pitch perfect satire to service members around the world.

Join thousands of troops, veterans, and defense insiders who read Duffel Blog before breakfast.

“A must-read for national security nerds.”

—The Daily Beast
Subscribe form

Free. No spam. Unsubscribe anytime.

14years publishing
4,200+dispatches filed
17,000+readers briefed

The Duffel Brief · the free edition, Monday, Wednesday and Friday

Vol. 15 · No. 129 · Wednesday, 28 October 2026

Army

Hasan execution venue double-booked with Comic-Con

Army officials insist neither event can be rescheduled without losing deposit

Trump announces sale of Patriot missiles to Russia

Hegseth consults God via dumpster fire behind Pentagon

Three editions a week, paid for by our subscribers

Vol. 15 · No. 129

Worldwide edition

Reader supported

Delivered 3× weekly

America's most trusted military news source

Duffel Blog

Established 2012 · Deployed worldwide

Vol. 15 · No. 129 · Deployed worldwide

Wednesday

28 October 2026

1008 Zulu

Next edition Wednesday

← Front page
· Page 2

7 countries to invade now that we're leaving Afghanistan

Filed · 1551

Leaving Afghanistan reminds many troops of getting divorced from their first spouse. While they may now be incredibly happy, free, and ready to bang anything that moves, it can be sad to say goodbye to a person or place that, while they made you miserable, provided some of life's defining experiences.

Much like a bad breakup, one of the keys to getting over Afghanistan quickly is finding a new country to invade, so that hundreds of thousands of troops can earn combat actions badges and a case of depression for years to come. While it can be tough to narrow down the pool of eligible bachelors and bachelorettes, Duffel Blog believes these seven countries should be considered for invasion now that we’re leaving Afghanistan.

Canada

How have we not already invaded these syrup guzzlers? We share a border with them and they have oil. What are we waiting for?

Also on this page

Your Cart

Your cart is empty

Browse the shop to find something you like.

Continue Shopping →
Subtotal

Add more for free shipping.

✓ You qualify for free shipping!