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The Duffel Brief · the free edition, Monday, Wednesday and Friday

Vol. 15 · No. 126 · Thursday, 22 October 2026

Pentagon

Hegseth consults God via dumpster fire behind Pentagon

Secretary says God commanded him to invade Greenland, restore Christian values

US to livestream execution of Ukraine

Iran condemns US plan to livestream execution as barbaric

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Vol. 15 · No. 126 · Deployed worldwide

Thursday

22 October 2026

1951 Zulu

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← Front page
Army · Page 4

Army hopeful new combat fitness test will turn the tide of war in Afghanistan

Filed · 1532

PENTAGON — After 40 years of the same physical fitness test, the Army has announced a new combat focused test that will reverse its recent spate of war loses dating back to Vietnam, sources confirmed today.

“The new test is combat-focused,” said Esper. “It’s a game changer. Clearly our inability to properly test our soldiers’ physical fitness levels has led to some poor outcomes in recent conflicts.”

The Army Combat Readiness Test is a massive change to the current assessment and will include six events: the deadlift, power throw, push-up, sprint/drag/carry, leg tuck, and 2 mile run.

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