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This week in American power projection: the map was wrong, the dorms were fine, and the travel card was for official purposes.

Story Roundup

Pentagon casualties, metric improvement, and Fat Leonard’s least dignified phase.

Situation Report

A State Department map that relocated most of Africa, one ambitious government travel card, and 5,200 medical students moved from dorms that definitely do not have mold.

Private 'pretty sure' his headache is Ebola

FORT INDIANTOWN GAP — The Pennsylvania Army National Guard placed Fort Indiantown Gap on lockdown today, after Private Patrick O’Neil reported “ebola-like symptoms” to his unit medic.

“Yeah, my head is killing me, and I want to throw up,” O’Neil told reporters through his plastic isolation bubble. “I’m definitely pretty sure this is Ebola.”

O’Neil says he believes he contracted the disease after riding on a C-130 that had recently returned to the United States from transporting soldiers to AFRICOM, the military’s “Africa Command.”

“There was some stuff on the canvas next to me that was almost probably blood, or maybe mucus, or something like that,” O’Neil said. “So, yeah, this has gotta be Ebola.”

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