JOINT BASE ELMENDORF RICHARDSON, ALASKA — The U.S. Army's top brass is planning to add at least two hours of classroom instruction to Captain's Career Course on how properly embezzle money and commit insurance fraud, sources confirmed today.

"We all recognize that it's unrealistic to expect a person to support a family of four on an O-5's roughly $11,000-per-month salary, so it's an unwritten understanding that as officers and gentlemen, we find ways to get our side hustle on,” said Maj. Gen. Mark O'Neil, U.S. Army Alaska commanding general.

The addition of training in the art of "the side hustle" was added in response to the case of Lt. Col. Christopher DeMure, who was recently charged with allegedly defrauding insurance providers out of hundreds of thousands of dollars.

“Frankly, it's astonishing to me that someone could make it to field-grade rank without figuring out how to bring in under-the-table cash on the sly," O'Neil said. "For God's sake, I've known E-4's who were better at running scams without getting caught."