PENTAGON — After weighing overwhelming feedback from active-duty soldiers opposed to costly uniform changes, the US Army has decided to redesign its current uniform on an annual basis, sources confirmed today.

“We have a serious problem with stolen valor, and this will prevent fakers from keeping up with changing uniforms,” Daniel A. Dailey, Sergeant Major of the Army, told reporters. “There are other reasons too, but really, this is the Army, and we like to say we support our soldiers while costing them money and making their lives miserable as much as we can.”

Since 9/11, the Army has gone through five combat uniforms: The Battle Dress Uniform, Desert Camouflage Uniform, Army Combat Uniform, Operational Combat Pattern uniform, Multicams, and now the Scorpion W2 pattern. But officials are hoping to bring that number up into the teens within the next few years.