NORFOLK, Va. — A Navy contractor was promoted from wearing a dirty t-shirt and jeans to polo and khakis, sources report.

“I'm allowed to shop at the store that sells navy blue polos, khakis, and black fleece now,” Contractor Dave Bautista said of his promotion. “I also got some gel so I can slick back my hair. However, I won't forget where I came from. In fact, I'm going to call in a bomb threat tomorrow to get off work early.”