This week in American power projection: the map was wrong, the dorms were fine, and the travel card was for official purposes.
Story Roundup
Pentagon casualties, metric improvement, and Fat Leonard’s least dignified phase.
Situation Report
Geraldo Rivera divulges plans for Gen Mattis' surprise birthday party
MacDill AFB, Tampa, FL - The servicemembers of Central Command (CENTCOM) were shocked to learn that intiricate plans for a surprise birthday party for General James "Mad Dog" Mattis have been leaked by television journalist Geraldo Rivera.
"I wanna know who let the cat outta the bag," said CENTCOM Command Sergeant Major Frank "Kung Fu" Grippe. "This is bullshit. We had a cake planned. And punch. Now it's ruined."
The leak occurred during a recent episode of "The O'Reilly Factor" on Fox News Channel. During a heated discussion, host Bill O'Reilly challenged Rivera to explain comments that "he was close to many top defense officials."
"What do you know, Rivera? You know squat. Bupkus. You got nothin'!," O'Reilly said.
More Stories
Opinion: Listen up, assholes. Turn in your excess cruise missiles or everybody stays in formation
Bull Winkle
|
Army Reserve adopts 'Nothing we do today is more important than lunch' as new recruiting slogan
SECDEF_Nice
|
Hegseth mistakes getting older for declining military standards
SECDEF_Nice
|
Duffel Blog’s Top 13 ideas for solving the Iran War
Duffel Blog Staff
|
Americans begin thanking troops for future service
Carl
|
Pentagon limits combat casualties to normal business hours
Bad Lawyer
|
Duffel Labs
A field desk of military mischief and useful bad ideas
Pentagon Buzzword Generator
Generate authentic defense jargon.
Pocket NCO
Leadership advice with a knife hand.
Navy SEAL Book Generator
One click. Instant airport bestseller.
DD-214 Fortune Teller
Your civilian future, declassified.
Military Speech Builder
Remarks for ceremonies and mandatory fun.
Veteran Benefits Finder
Find benefits you might have missed.
View all Labs tools →
