Skip to content
DUFFEL BLOG

Free military brief. No CAC required.

For more than a decade, we've deployed pitch perfect satire to service members around the world.

Join thousands of troops, veterans, and defense insiders who read Duffel Blog before breakfast.

“A must-read for national security nerds.”

—The Daily Beast
Subscribe form

Free. No spam. Unsubscribe anytime.

14years publishing
4,200+dispatches filed
17,000+readers briefed

The Duffel Brief · the free edition, Monday, Wednesday and Friday

Vol. 15 · No. 130 · Sunday, 1 November 2026

Veterans

Spirit Halloween store to become pop-up ICE detention center

DHS praises seasonal retailer's expertise in occupying abandoned buildings and disappearing overnight

Army FRG unveils haunted house featuring spouses saying ‘I’m fine’

Hasan execution venue double-booked with Comic-Con

Three editions a week, paid for by our subscribers

Vol. 15 · No. 130

Worldwide edition

Reader supported

Delivered 3× weekly

America's most trusted military news source

Duffel Blog

Established 2012 · Deployed worldwide

Vol. 15 · No. 130 · Deployed worldwide

Sunday

1 November 2026

1418 Zulu

Next edition Monday

← Front page
Pentagon · Page 3

Hegseth announces new $HARP program to combat military sexual assault

The 2025 Pay Harassers and Assault Reporters Plenty program is coming soon.

Filed · 0501

MINNEAPOLIS, Minn. — In preparation for his anticipated role as the next Secretary of Defense, Fox and Friends Weekend host and former National Guard Maj. Pete Hegseth is reviewing Department of Defense policies he believes must be maintained, scrapped, or overhauled. 

One persistent issue in the U.S. military is the threat of sexual assault and harassment among service members. Drawing on the Army’s Sexual Harassment-Assault Response Program (SHARP), a proactive program implemented by the Army in 2005, Hegseth and his team have outlined plans for a new, Department of Defense-wide program they call ‘$HARP.’

According to Hegseth, the 2025 Pay Harassers and Assault Reporters Plenty program will institute a policy to protect drunken service members — particularly men — who find themselves being lured in by wicked temptresses and vixens to engage in rough sex the men don’t consent to, only to see those treacherous women filing superfluous and fake police reports later. 

The policy will also provide male service members with the financial and legal means to pay their accusers and get them to sign non-disclosure agreements to keep their filthy mouths shut about events that were totally consensual. 

Also on this page

Your Cart

Your cart is empty

Browse the shop to find something you like.

Continue Shopping →
Subtotal

Add more for free shipping.

✓ You qualify for free shipping!