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The Duffel Brief · the free edition, Monday, Wednesday and Friday

Vol. 15 · No. 118 · Friday, 2 October 2026

Navy & Marines

Paste-eating Marine praised for unmatched commitment to unit

Unit leaders say his ability to stick with the mission is unmatched

Backed-up toilet appointed new Secretary of the Army

Space Force’s new uniform puts a little goose back in the step

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Vol. 15 · No. 118

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Duffel Blog

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Vol. 15 · No. 118 · Deployed worldwide

Friday

2 October 2026

2139 Zulu

Next edition Monday

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· Page 2

Most ISIS militants still have not completed safety stand down for islamic New Year

Filed · 1541

MOSUL, Iraq — Life as an admin officer with the Islamic State of Iraq and the Levant (ISIS or ISIL) is hectic enough, but for Khalil Nassar, this October has been a certifiable nightmare.

Nassar, who “literally can’t even” right now, is the equivalent of a captain in the U.S. Army and deals with a “veritable ziftstorm” of paperwork every day, along with the incessant nagging of field-grade officers.

“‘Why haven’t our soldiers completed the safety stand down for the upcoming holiday?’ they ask,” complains an exasperated Nassar, rubbing his temples. “Do I look like a platoon sergeant? I’ve got enough on my plate with the start of the new fiscal year and this leave tracker for Murharram [Islamic New Year]. How should I know if Jamal Schmuckatalmoud sat through the goddamn PowerPoint?”

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