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Neller to female Marines: 'Come on baby, trust me'

WASHINGTON – In a recent statement attempting to smooth things over with female Marines in the wake of the Marines United nude photo scandal, Marine Commandant Gen. Robert Neller uttered the relationship-killing phrase “come on baby, trust me.”

The reaction among female Marines was swift and overwhelmingly negative.

“Every woman in the world has learned not to believe a man who says ‘trust me’ since she was 14. ‘It’s just soda, baby, trust me’ or ‘I promise you won’t get pregnant if we do it in the shower, trust me.’ Yeah right, a-hole,” said Sgt. Monica Birch.

“Trust him? Are you kidding me? If a man has to tell you to trust him, it’s because he’s a shady motherfucker you need to run away from as fast as possible,” said Capt. Jennifer Tanner.

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