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The Duffel Brief · the free edition, Monday, Wednesday and Friday

Vol. 15 · No. 114 · Wednesday, 23 September 2026

Army

Mitch McConnell returns from extended drill weekend

Staff says senator’s three-month absence was “routine National Guard obligation”

Trump considers replacing Hegseth with rock or something

Army adopts ‘Your body, my choice’ as new recruiting slogan

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Vol. 15 · No. 114

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Vol. 15 · No. 114 · Deployed worldwide

Wednesday

23 September 2026

2206 Zulu

Next edition Friday

← Front page
· Page 2

“Hard times don’t last, hard men do” says visibly erect Sgt. Maj.

Filed · 1551

FORT HOOD, Texas — In a speech to his assembled battalion Tuesday, Sgt. Maj. Wade Thompson of the First Sustainment Brigade, First Cavalry Regiment, emphasized to his Soldiers that they must remain firm in the face of adversity. Thompson further reinforced his impassioned and motivational message by delivering it while visibly aroused.

The content of the speech focused mainly around navigating hard times with iron resolve while standing tall and proud. Speaking for a total of 11 minutes, Sgt Maj. Thompson related his message to a variety of professional topics but it was during his foray into standards and discipline that Soldiers first noticed an increasing bulge in the senior NCO’s pants. By the time Sgt Maj Thompson began explaining how vehicle maintenance relates to the seven Army Values, he was fully erect.

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