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The Duffel Brief · the free edition, Monday, Wednesday and Friday

Vol. 15 · No. 129 · Wednesday, 28 October 2026

Army

Army FRG unveils haunted house featuring spouses saying ‘I’m fine’

Soldiers describe Halloween attraction as more frightening than combat deployment

Hasan execution venue double-booked with Comic-Con

Trump announces sale of Patriot missiles to Russia

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Vol. 15 · No. 129

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Vol. 15 · No. 129 · Deployed worldwide

Wednesday

28 October 2026

0500 Zulu

Next edition Friday

← Front page
· Page 2

SECDEF: The dog ate my orders book

Filed · 1550

THE PENTAGRAM — Today Secretary of Defense Mark T. Esper told President Trump that critical instructions to military units worldwide were delayed because a dog ate his Orders Book.

“I’m sorry,” Esper reportedly told the president, “but because of that dog, we no longer have your orders to bomb the new Chinese island bases in the South China Sea, or to send Title 10 troops to clean out Portland, or to ‘Make Fort Hood Great Again,’” as Trump reportedly demanded.

The Secretary of Defense’s Orders Book (SDOB) — little known outside Joint Staff circles — is part of the military’s adaptive planning and execution enterprise where force sourcing and execution are directed. In other words, it’s a big deal and not something a dog should eat.

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