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The Duffel Brief · the free edition, Monday, Wednesday and Friday

Vol. 15 · No. 124 · Saturday, 17 October 2026

OpFor

Iran condemns US plan to livestream execution as barbaric

Tehran questions whether America has completely abandoned standards of human decency

Vetbro apparel company pivots from stupid shirts to aggressively homoerotic ones

AI deemed ‘too smart’ to replace infantry

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Vol. 15 · No. 124

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Vol. 15 · No. 124 · Deployed worldwide

Saturday

17 October 2026

1204 Zulu

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· Page 2

Soldier hospitalized after masturbating with CLP

Filed · 1540

FORT CAMPBELL, Ky. — After complaining that his "dick pipe closed up," Pvt. Eric Draughter was admitted to Blanchfield Army Community Hospital early Wednesday where he was diagnosed with having Cleaner, Lubricant, and Protectant (CLP) in his urethra.

“CLP, a solvent for stripping firing residue from weapons, is not meant for human consumption or use as a personal lubricant,” said Dr. Russell Beckham, while holding back tears of what was likely laughter.

A source at Blanchfield told Duffel Blog that Draughter could barely walk when he stumbled through the emergency room doors around 2:00 am on Wednesday.

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