Dear Mackenzie,

Thanks for your kind words. The support of young Americans like you makes everything we do feel at least marginally worthwhile. But let’s get a few things straight.

First of all, I’m not your friend. In fact, I specifically tried to avoid receiving this letter to save myself the burden of writing you back.

Second, your black-and-white characterization of this conflict grossly misunderstands the complexity of modern warfare and, indeed, the folly of declared war against any group as broadly unspecific as “the terrorists.”