KABUL, AFGHANISTAN - Taliban leadership announced today that they were pulling out of joint peace talks with the United States and Britain. Speaking by satellite telephone, Deputy Minister of Foreign Affiars Abdul Rahman Zahed spoke about the cultural divide that brought on the latest stalemate.
"We come together to discuss peace, and so we drink tea to start our meeting," said Zahed. "We bring finest tea from Waziristan, so fine that Allah would come down and bless the pot."
At the meeting, leaders from all sides came to the table to try to work out agreements on ending the long war in Afghanistan. In a gesture of peace before the meet, the Taliban agreed to not blow up any crowded markets -- quite incredibly -- for an entire week.
"We were definitely happy that they wouldn't be blowing people up," said U.S. Ambassador Paul Hugo, "but those bastards never asked us for anything in return, so we lit them up prior to the meeting."
