KABUL, AFGHANISTAN - The top U.S. General in Afghanistan has distanced himself from recent comments on the situation there, saying that "it was simply a bad joke that was not reflective of his overall view," according to a written statement from International Security Assistance Force (ISAF) public affairs.

Gen. John Allen, the commander of ISAF, was quoted last week by a reporter with Newsweek as saying, "We should just take off and nuke the entire site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure." He went on to also offer a harsh rebuke of President Hamid Karzai, saying "we should just grease this rat-fuck son-of-a-bitch right now."

Believing that the remarks were off-the-record, he continued to talk of a different strategy for the war.

"Okay. We have several thousand canisters of CN-20," he said, pointing to a map of the suspected location of Haqqani network operatives. "I say we go back in there and nerve gas the whole fuckin' nest."