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The Duffel Brief · the free edition, Monday, Wednesday and Friday

Vol. 15 · No. 115 · Friday, 25 September 2026

Pentagon

Military leaders debate who gets to masturbate first in sniper arch

Services clash over historic privilege of being first to defile nation’s newest military monument

Mitch McConnell returns from extended drill weekend

Trump considers replacing Hegseth with rock or something

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Vol. 15 · No. 115

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Duffel Blog

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Vol. 15 · No. 115 · Deployed worldwide

Friday

25 September 2026

1558 Zulu

Next edition Monday

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· Page 2

Trump and Kim to face off in epic dance battle

Filed · 1534

WASHINGTON — The international nuclear feud between President Donald Trump and North Korean Supreme Leader Kim Jong-Un will soon culminate in the last remaining non-military option, with both taking part in an epic dance battle.

“I told that whacko maniac we need to settle this like REAL men – with a dance-off,” Trump tweeted last night. “China’s finally stepping up, and they’re gonna host! Gotta love China. Smart kids over there.”

In a news conference live-tweeted by Trump, Chinese President Xi Jinping announced the event would be held in the Bird’s Nest, site of the 2008 summer Olympic Games.

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