Skip to content
DUFFEL BLOG

Free military brief. No CAC required.

For more than a decade, we've deployed pitch perfect satire to service members around the world.

Join thousands of troops, veterans, and defense insiders who read Duffel Blog before breakfast.

“A must-read for national security nerds.”

—The Daily Beast
Subscribe form

Free. No spam. Unsubscribe anytime.

14years publishing
4,200+dispatches filed
20,000+readers briefed

U.S. Intelligence community successfully predicts Super Bowl

LANGLEY, VA – Members of the U.S. intelligence community held a press conference today to report that one of their analysts not only successfully predicted the results of Sunday's Super Bowl XLVII, but accurately made his prediction more than five years ago!

Even more amazing, the analyst has never watched a football game and knew absolutely nothing about football prior to his being assigned to the American-Rules Football Desk at the Central Intelligence Agency.

"Well, when we first hired Analyst "Jay" [not his real name] in 2007 he told us that he really wanted to work the Baseball Desk, since he'd been playing baseball ever since he was a kid and totally loved the sport," said an anonymous highly-placed CIA official.

"Unfortunately our Baseball Desk was already full and we only had authorization to staff the Football Desk."

More Stories

Your Cart

Your cart is empty

Browse the shop to find something you like.

Continue Shopping →
Subtotal

Add more for free shipping.

✓ You qualify for free shipping!