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The Duffel Brief · the free edition, Monday, Wednesday and Friday

Vol. 15 · No. 136 · Saturday, 14 November 2026

Navy & Marines

Marine with extremely low IQ thrilled by switch to Super Intelligence

Marine Corps announces major technological advancement requiring millions of dollars in new signage and PowerPoint slides

Homeless veterans receive 10% off cardboard boxes this Veterans Day

Hegseth asks staff to make next execution more like ‘The Running Man’

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Vol. 15 · No. 136

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Duffel Blog

Established 2012 · Deployed worldwide

Vol. 15 · No. 136 · Deployed worldwide

Saturday

14 November 2026

1436 Zulu

Next edition Monday

← Front page
Veterans · Page 2

Veteran-turned-waiter appalled no one is thanking him for his customer service

Filed · 1541

PHILADELPHIA, Pa. — Admitting that he is inconsolably irritated and just doesn’t understand why, numerous sources confirmed that local Applebee’s waiter Samuel Higgins has not yet once been thanked for his customer service early Sunday.

Higgins, 23, a Philadelphia native and Air Force veteran, is reportedly drowning in a flood of ingratitude and Spinach & Artichoke Dip as he haplessly struggles to upright his self-respect along with two teetering serving trays in either hand.

“You know, I just wish people knew what we in the service industry go through every day,” says Higgins. “It’s not easy to take orders and execute them under stress in a timely and reliable manner, day in and day out.

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