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The Duffel Brief · the free edition, Monday, Wednesday and Friday

Vol. 15 · No. 121 · Saturday, 10 October 2026

Pentagon

Hegseth opens up new TradWife MOS

Army says new career field will allow warfighters to focus on lethality while someone else remembers the kids

DTS works properly after hack by rogue AI

Lincoln sailor returning from deployment already broke

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Vol. 15 · No. 121

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Duffel Blog

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Vol. 15 · No. 121 · Deployed worldwide

Saturday

10 October 2026

1413 Zulu

Next edition Monday

← Front page
· Page 2

Mattis clears head during evening stroll, 8 killed

Filed · 1535

WASHINGTON — The Metropolitan Police Special Tactics Branch was activated Saturday night after a fatigued Secretary of Defense James Mattis took eight lives during a casual walk through the downtown area.

Calls to the 911 emergency line began coming in around 6:35 p.m. with reports of a man lying face down with a Vietnam War-era bayonet stuck through the external occipital protuberance area of his skull, as well as at least three other victims having been thrown off of the 14th Street Bridge, sources confirmed.

Police were on the scene within three minutes and encountered a male white subject in his 60s calmly tearing out the vocal chords of a demonstrator from People Power and Potluck! while simultaneously breaking the neck of a passing meter maid.

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